All the pre-season tasks have opened up for Round 3 and I’ve pretty much done all of the tasks but the last.

I guess I should give a run down of my 1 month goals for Round 3.

• Do 18 press ups on toes
• 100 squats challenge
• Body fat at 17.5%
• Maintain weight at 50kg
• Update and blog more regularly
• Log all food eaten and blog about it to keep me accountable
• Eliminate sugar (refined sugar, fructose – not in fruits) from diet.

I have highlighted a number of red flag days. I am away from home a couple of times in during the round and also have a move scheduled so that will be a great challenge to get workouts done without a gym. I do have my back-up workouts from Bodyrock.tv which are awesome.

So that is pretty much it for that. I will try to blog regularly about my sugar progress. I have to admit that this week I have gone overboard with chocolate and biscuits and as I type this, I feel really crap. I can safely say that sugar is bad!

Also just a note that I am working on a new layout because I’m sick of this and want something a little flashy to show off. I am off now to get some sleep for an early morning tomorrow.

It has been a fair while since I have updated and that has to do with the fact that I have gotten so caught up with life and work and everything else in between. Attended the 12WBT finale workout and party which was awesome and so amazing to meet all my virtual supporters. Also had a friend visit from out of town and just trying to relax after a ferocious 12 weeks of lean and strong.

I have learnt a lot over the 4 weeks and have to say that I am disappointed how I tackled it. On the other hand, I felt that  if I didn’t “go off the rails” I wouldn’t be where I am now and come to realise I need to take my finger out of my ears and listen. I have consumed so much crap that I am almost ready to kick myself and knock myself silly. Tonight has been no different from the other nights with the desserts and snacks I had after dinner. Argh. I whinge about it quite a fair bit on Twitter and sound like a broken record every time I tweet that I had a chocolate bar or 4 with a pack of chips, etc, etc. I find it amazing that I know I am doing it, feel guilty and then angry about it. My exercise routine hasn’t slowed down at all and in fact working harder than I have ever done. It’s the vicious food cycle I am going through at the moment. In fact now I can feel the effects of too much sugar from tonight’s binge.

I’ve said it, the B word. Binge. Yes, I am one of those people that for some reason finds no satisfaction in 1 piece of chocolate or cake and feels the need to eat the whole entire thing. I am trying to understand the science behind it and reading up but that has just thrown up a whole lot of other questions. Am I lacking some vitamin or mineral that stops these cravings? Do I not savour my food enough? Do I eat too fast? Is my body broken? Am I eating because I’m going through some emotion? I think it’s time to work the lay-by system again. I haven’t done one of tasks required for round 3 which is the kitchen clean-up. I think that is one part of my downfall at the moment. Having things I need to make something within easy reach. It will be done tomorrow night. Yes, IT WILL. I will throw out the chocolate. I will throw out the sugar. I don’t need it.

I have put on some weight in the 4 weeks and that does make me sad. I didn’t need this lousy feeling after feeling so great before. I said to myself last night, back to 1200 calories but today just didn’t work when I got up late and was flaffing around to make sure I got to work on time. That plan I made backfired so bad I faltered after lunch. I re-evaluated my excuses and added more in. I clearly needed to. I also updated my goals to include food goals to ensure I keep to the plan. I did also make my stupidly yummy almond and coconut slice which I think will need to be brought in to work for everyone else to eat so it doesn’t stay in the house for me to munch on in the evenings. It’s not terribly unhealthy but knowing my tendencies it’s better it’s gone.

Anyway, that’s my pouring of thoughts and frustrations for the month over food. I do want a better relationship with food. It is not evil. It is what fuels me to get me into the shape that I want and I WILL HAVE. So please anyone on Twitter or Facebook, keep reminding me of the goal. The goal to be lean and strong.

Round 2 has been the biggest challenge since I started the 12WBT and boy what a journey it has been. I am now leaner and stronger than I have ever been. My yoga practise has improved so much as has my running. I love this program so much that I am signing up again for round 3. Here’s a run down on my goals and my accomplishments.

• Maintain weight lost Well I lost more weight. Not much about a kilo.
• 15 push-ups on toes Done! I can actually do about 16-18 depending on the day and how my shoulders feel. So proud. Now I just do push-ups on toes then if I feel like I can’t hold it, I move onto the girly push-ups.
• Keep working with heavier weights. Try to chest press 1 set with 8kg dumbbells with good form. Well this has been a struggle because the gym changed the free weights section. No more smith machine (:( ) and there aren’t any between weights from 5kg to 10kg so I haven’t been able to access these without getting the evil eye from the PTs every now and then when I go into the PT room to grab them. I might try later in the week and see how I go. I do find that my form goes pear shaped when I get up weights. I’m sure I can but just haven’t done it.
• Buy a pair of size 6 pants I bought 2 size 6 pants in the last couple of weeks because a few brands I like their size 8s are way too big (yes looking at you vanity sized SABA and CUE). Nothing wrong with vanity sizing but really makes it a pain when all you want to do is grab clothes off the rack. I am a lovely UK size 8 now verified by my ASOS purchase last month although the skirt I bought is a little loose.
• Get body fat to 18% based on my scales Well on weigh-in day, I jumped on my scales and viola, 18% on the dot! That took me to a loss of 3.8% and according to my friend, 20% body fat loss once you do the math. I still don’t quite get it but hey, he said it sounds better.

Now that the round has finished I have learnt so much more about myself and it is still a process to break years of bad habits like snacking on the wrong foods and over-eating. I still struggle with that a lot and I am still consciously making myself aware of this. I think it will take more mindset lessons to get me through but it will happen one day. I am actually quite pleased now that I am actually making a lot more of my own food meals, even desserts. At least now I know what is going into my food as opposed to going into a cake shop and not knowing what proportion of ingredients they use. I can make modifications where I want and still get the dessert I want.

While I wait for round 3 to start, I am hoping to restart the lean and strong program from round 2 as well as doing some group classes again in preparation for round 3so that I don’t lose the strength that I have gained. I am also looking forward to the training session next Saturday where Michelle will be training us in our groups. It will be so much fun! Also the finale party is on the same day and I finally get to frock up and meet my friends from the program. Thankfully the venue is close to home so if I do want to disappear, it’s just a short walk home.

Bring on round 3 because I want myself a great beach body for summer! I haven’t felt this good in years!

Oh no, 2 weeks left on the program for Round 2. I’m scared. I have to say this round has been so difficult. It’s so easy losing weight. It’s harder trying to maintain it and even build some muscle. I upped my calories from 1200, to 1300  and now finally to 1400 and god, I’m struggling. I think it was the fact that I thought, “OK, now I can eat more, I’ll choose more calorific food.” Well, the calorific food involved muesli bars (which I think are great snacks, in moderation, not 3 at a time), cakes, biccies and fruit bread brought into work for morning tea. Sigh. So I’ve decided that with 2 weeks left, I am going to try my best to avoid or at least limit my snacks to unprocessed food or at least something more protein based. I’ve gotten rid of the baked goods I made over the weekend. I admit, I threw most of them out and then I did eat some. o_o

I really don’t find exercising hard so it had never been an issue of getting to the gym. I’m thinking I might add some cardio in the morning to get me going. So I will keep following the Nike Training Club workouts. I think they are really good. I wish my apartment had a bit more space for me to do the workout because I can do it without wearing headphones instead of at the gym and I have to wear my arm band and headphones. I end up picking workouts that don’t require much space. Another option would be to get the skipping rope out and skipping out on the balcony. I’m sure the neighbours won’t mind the sound of skipping. LOL.

Anyway, that is the plan of attack for the next 2 weeks. I also bought a pair of size 6 pants. They fit, i.e. I can zip them up. Yeah, there’s muffin top and I don’t think I could sit down in them. LOL. So hopefully at the end of the 2 weeks or at least at the end of next month, they will sit pretty!

Here we go. It is week 8 and I’m going to reassess my goals again. Here were my goals from last month and little comments:

• Lose 1.5kg – Weigh in is tomorrow, I’m hoping that I get this goal. I am already 1.1kg down beyond my goal weight and starting to see things take shape.
• Finish 10km run at Gold Coast in 1hr 20mins – Done! 1hr 7mins. SMASHED!
• Do a chin-up to prove I can do them – Well still haven’t really done 1 but have attempted jumping chins and able to get the reps out although not so graceful.
• Keep working with heavier weights wherever I can – Done!
• Complete new website layout! – You’re looking at it!

My goals for next month are:

• Maintain weight lost
  I have started upping my calories having extra snacks. As you may have read, have been struggling with that and listened to the live video today and might try adding calories in my main meal. Going to be tricky but we will see. I have also found more nutritious and higher protein snacks to get me by.
• 15 push-ups on toes
• Keep working with heavier weights. Try to chest press 1 set with 8kg dumbbells with good form.
• Buy a pair of size 6 pants (0_0)
• Get body fat to 18% based on my scales (not entirely accurate but at least a gauge until I get it done properly)

I hope to accomplish this in the next 4 weeks. I’m worried I may not get there in terms of certain strength goals. I am feeling a lot of un-love from some friends in terms of how they see me. I keep getting the whole “just eat whatever you want, you deserve it”. It was precisely this mentality that got me to my lowest point in the first place and the whole point of why I took up this challenge, to cultivate good habits. I don’t deny myself treats, I negotiate, I lay by, I do everything I can to make sure I eat clean. It appears that some of my guy friends (in particular) can’t get it that I can’t live the way that they do. I am a person that can put on weight in the blink of an eye, even with exercise (important point to make is that I was the same weight for 2 years (overweight BMI) trying hard to look good but never worked because of my nutrition and lifestyle, then slowed down exercise and got heavy). I just hope these friends don’t sabotage the hard work I have put in the last 5 months because I will get mad. I still can’t believe after all this time, I still get this sort of crap from my friends. They just don’t get it. I think it might be time to move on. The point now isn’t weight loss. It’s about living clean, being healthy and strong as I can be. I just want to look and feel great!!

Enough of the rant because it just makes my blood boil. Now I leave you with some pretty pictures!